The Death of Commonsense
My parents told me about Mr.
Commonsense early in my life
and told me I would do well to
call on him when making decisions.
It seems he was always around in
my early years but less and less as
time passed by until today I read
his obituary. Please join me in a
moment of silence in remembrance.
For Common Sense had served us all so
well for so many generations.
Obituary
Commonsense
Today we mourn the passing of a
beloved old friend, Common Sense,
who has been with us for many years.
No one knows for sure how old he
was since his birth records were long
ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He
will be remembered as having cultivated
such valuable lessons as knowing when
to come in out of the rain, why the early
bird gets the worm, life isn't always fair,
and maybe it was my fault.
Common Sense lived by simple, sound
financial policies (don't spend more
than you earn) and reliable parenting
strategies (adults, not children are in
charge). His health began to deteriorate
rapidly when well intentioned but
overbearing regulations were set in
place. Reports of a six-year-old boy
charged with sexual harassment for
kissing a classmate; teens suspended
from school for using mouthwash after
lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding
an unruly student, only worsened his
condition.
Common Sense lost ground when parents
attacked teachers for doing the job they
themselves failed to do in disciplining
their unruly children. It declined even
further when schools were required to
get parental consent to administer
Aspirin, sun lotion or a sticky plaster
to a student; but could not inform the
parents when a student became pregnant
and wanted to have an abortion.
Common Sense lost the will to live
as the Ten Commandments became
contraband; churches became businesses;
and criminals received better treatment
than their victims. Commonsense took
a beating when you couldn't defend
yourself from a burglar in your own
home and the burglar can sue you
for assault.
Commonsense finally gave up the
will to live, after a woman failed to
realize that a steaming cup of coffee
was hot. She spilled a little in her lap,
and was promptly awarded a huge
settlement.
Commonsense was preceded in death by
his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife,
Discretion; his daughter, Responsibility;
and his son, Reason. He is survived by
three stepbrothers; I Know my Rights,
Someone Else is to Blame, and I'm a Victim.
Not many attended his funeral because
so few realized he was gone. If you still
remember him pass this on. If not, join
the majority and do nothing.
Author unknown
A man is as good as the truth he speaks.
David Phillips